Total Pageviews

Finding Neverland Blog Archive

I Miss You, Father.


Written By: Anonymous.

There's full moon shivering on the sky shining as much as it can. I'm missing you AGAIN father. Well, tonight it was something else.  Not likely always. I get a flashback of my bestest times with you. Singing the verse.

You tucked me in,turned out the light,
kept me safe and sound at night,

little girls depend on things like that.
brushed my teeth and combed my hair.
had to drive me everywhere
you were always there when I looked back
you had to do it all alone, make a living make a home
must have been as hard as it could be.
and when i couldn't sleep at night
scary things wouldn't turn out right,
you would hold my hand and sing to me.

I was singing it and crying, tears rolling down to my cheeks letting me know that what your presence meant to me.About the best times I had with was when you used to take us to the park and we used to slide and enjoy other rides while you were always busy or lost in some deep thought.

I always wondered what was going on, in your mind. But  I could never find it out. Other bestest memories of my life are, when you used to bring us ice cream every second night. I remember that I always used to be the one to receive you from the door with that huge smile on your face when you'd see me running towards you for a hug, and throwing me in air thou I was never scared of falling because I always knew you'd always catch me. And when you'd to take my side whenever mother was mad at me.

You were always fulfilling my demands, in anyway you could. You used to get me those bubble gums with tattoos in them. You always knew they were my favorite. You had admitted me in one of the best schools of the city. You were proud, on the way I was trying, improving at every step. You saw me different than my other siblings.

I have this blurred scene of my admission when mom made me wear a bluish green frock. I got ready and you took me to the school, into the office;holding me carefully in your arms. then leaving me there for the test. And the sudden glow of happiness when you came to know that I had made it to that school and they were taking me in 1st standard directly, but you and mom decided to admit me from nursery. And when you used to teach me maths and English like you were the only expert I had ever seen. My idol for life. And that glow of joy on your face while receiving my report card at school, knowing that I had stood first in the whole class. That moment of relief for you that I was good at studies, just as you wanted me to be.

And then you being excited at our annual functions of school, capturing my pictures from our tablo from  every single angle you could find. Because you loved photography too. You being proud of me and telling your friends how attentive your daughter was. I had that crazy haircut that you always got me.

I couldn't see you in any kind of problem though I  wasn't even mature enough to understand what problem really was, but just seeing you in that mood would make me sad too. I took your side on everything. Crying when you and mom got into little fights. I was scared. I was always my daddy's little stubborn, sensitive type of girl that he always loved.

You could never see me in tears and therefore whenever I had to get something I just had to shed few tears and you'd bring it to me but asking for a smile before I could get it. You were and will be always my hero. My first love. Every father is her daughter's first love. She thinks that every guy in the world should be as caring, loving and cherishing as her father is.

You made me feel protective. You would never let other siblings make fun of me at anything. you were always over-protective for me. I miss that TOO. because now, I don't have anyone to look at me the way you did; with those shining eyes. I never knew that I wouldn't get enough of it. You stayed with me just for 11 years.

Truthfully, I miss all those years. I wish that I could get into a time machine to get back to feel those moments over and over again. I wish that this was just a night mare and when i open my eyes and get everything back . And now, when I open my eye, a small tear would roll down my cheek following the trail, telling me that this all is real and I would never get that time back. But I can move on with those sweet memories of yours that are within me.

I'm glad that you were my father. Like every girl, I'd also say that you were, are and will be THE BEST FATHER. Every girl idolizes her father, but I have a spiritual connection with you that would never end, and cannot be understood by anyone. I hope that all your memories stay in my mind forever and ever and ever.

May your soul R.I.P. I hope you've given him a better place over there Allah, as he was a very special person. Love you alot abbu. I miss you deadly. Specially at my birthdays every year. And when I see other kids with their dads. It hurts. You'll always be loved by me. I don't want to remember you as in a bad memory.

Yours Ever depending daughter, Aashow.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I miss mine too.

qintarah said...

emotional.. :'/ the ones who have lost their dear ones can understand!!

Timoo said...

That made me love my dad even more.

May Allah grant your Dad the highest rank in Jannah.