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Finding Neverland Blog Archive

Tuesday, September 15, 2015

Walking through Life

Walking

There was something about today that I wanted to enjoy, so instead of thinking about the day and waiting for it to end I decided to go out for a walk at night. People were around but it was so quiet and peaceful. Dark, yes but the cool breeze was blowing and I could smell rain. It was close to perfect? Or maybe it was a day after ages when I felt I could be normal again.

I woke up with a strange dream that I was in Pakistan finally and someone told me I am totally safe there now, and was showing me all the good things around and also telling me I can eat everything I want and go anywhere I want freely, it felt so nice, it really did. Maybe that is the reason I felt so happy today. Too bad it was a dream, maybe someday it will come true? I miss Pakistan so much and I can't express that enough.

These past few days have been good, one of the toughest phase of my life, at least the first chapter of it has been completed. Surely it means these are the signs of good things to come? Or maybe I am speaking too early.

One thing is for sure these are going to be an interesting few months now, life is changing, times are changing and probably priorities are changing as well. It kinda feels nice though, something different and new to look forward to and the unpredictability factor still there.

It has taken a lot of strength and stamina for me to act normal and stay the same and this has drained me a lot, there were times when I really wanted to not literally end my life but well bang my head somewhere for sure.

Cricket is usually the thing I look forward to, to make or break my mood but since doctors asked me not to watch cricket I have been avoiding it just so that I can watch the Pakistan vs Zimbabwe series. Well that can't be high risk? That for sure won't be mouth watering or nail biting? Few easy wins for Pakistan will do the world of good to me.

One year in the United Kingdom completes as well, happening year to say the least. Overall it has been a wonderful experience, everything and everyone is so nice and peaceful. What a learning curve for me, also has turned me into a photographer.

Also, starting NHS advised dieting plan from tomorrow, at least this way I am going to eat something? And something is better than nothing and I have been eating literally nothing over the past few months still I have gained weight, talk about injustice, this demands for a .. Pizza.

Guess who has started part time job again? Yes, me. Guess where? Yes. With kids and that too cute ones. I can totally kidnap a few of them they are so adorable.

Still on summer vacations though, it will be 4 month long vacations and I haven't loved a university more than mine because of the number of vacations they give. 4 months of summer vacations. 3 weeks of Christmas, 3 weeks of Easter and here you have a total of 6 months of vacations and this does not include Saturdays or Sundays.

Traveling to Scotland once again next week and maybe will spend my Eid there as well, not the worst place to spend your Eid.

Few more months before I don't have to take the burden of someone else on me, and also to see who is what and who is worth and I am gonna make sure I avail this time.

The day is ending, hopefully the time will stop? No it won't but maybe tomorrow will be same? or maybe even better? or worse? Safe bet is worst but then, this is the element of surprise that keeps you going, spurs you to explore people and places and motivates you to walk through this life one day at a time. 

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