Wednesday, 8th May
Yesterday I was wondering why do I write a diary? Its weird, no? Its not like a daily diary like a typical teenage girl. I write once a week or so. But still its weird. Its like i don't want to forget anything that's happening to me. But what is happening to me? Nothing.
And what's the point of remembering everything. I don't understand myself. Its like there are alot of things I want to share with a friend but there is no friend so I just write everything down. But then I wonder if I had a chance to talk to someone what will I talk about? There's nothing to talk about. I'm totally awesome. :D Sometimes I just think that I think that my life is pathetic when actually its not. I spend the whole day sulking when there's nothing wrong. I don't look at the happier AWESOME side of my life and keep on lamenting over that one thing I don't have.
I look at those people who self harm and wonder what is going on with them? Why would anyone do that? Actually, why would a Muslim harm himself? It hurts really bad, no? And besides its haram. Everybody knows that. Our body is not really ours. It belongs to Allah. And if we ill-treat it, the day of judgement it will testify against us. Then why would you hurt yourself!? These girls, when they upload pictures with depressing quotes, what is wrong with you? Are you really sad or it is just some girl drama to gain attention? Your life can't be that bad I'm sure.
Why do girls cry in front of me? Why do people share stuff with people? Why do people share stuff with me? Aren't you scared that I'll be judging you? Or that I'll leak your secret? Or that I might start hating you once you open your heart to me. And the secrets you tell me, those secrets or those reasons that make you wanna cry they are lame. Just so lame that when you're talking to me I just want to laugh out loud, slap you really hard and walk away. Your guy ditched you? So what? Big deal. Why did you get involved with him in the first place? Or when all that has already happened why're you telling that to everybody? To gain sympathies?
I don't understand people. People are so weird so so weird that I almost hate them. Sometimes I wonder if everybody cries or only a few people do? Like they think that they are pretending to be happy during the day and at night when they are alone they cry to themselves. I wonder if everybody does that. Like they're all the same. Or only a few people do that!?
You know what I think? I think that everybody literally everybody thinks that life is unfair to them. That they're alone. Nobody is there for them. Nobody cares for them. Nobody is going to back them up. But the truth is they're no different. Everyone feels that way. This is what is wrong with everybody. So yeah stop thinking like that and grow up. Actually no. I'm just 16 I can't tell anyone to grow up I'm too small. Still it is weird. I don't know. People they like to be sad. That's why these depressing movies and books and blahblah are so famous. You just want some miracle to happen in your life when nothing is going to happen. You are going to be the same pathetic person forever and ever.
No matter how much i try to help you, you're never gonna change. Because that's how you get attention. Seriously, these girls. THEY ARE STUPID. I'm a girl too. They forget that.
PS you suck at writing an article and you can die. Lulzz.